It’s that time of year again and watching those Christmas themed TV shows and movies is inevitable. But here are some suggestions to make your holiday a little more enjoyable.

I suggest:

1. A Christmas Story - This movie has so many funny scenes. I particularly like scene where Ralph’s father gets the leg lamp(I want one of those!). The narration by the “Adult” Ralph is also very hilarious.
   

   Mother: All right. Now, are you ready to tell me where you heard that word?
   Adult Ralph narrating: Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master. But, I chickened out and said the first name that came to mind.
   Ralph: Schwartz!

2. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation - One of my favorite Chevey Chase movies. One of the funniest scenes in the movie is where Clark Griswald goes into a rant after not receiving an expected bonus from his boss. Here is that wonderful rant:
   

   Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me. I have one. I’d like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight.

   I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a

   cheap, lying,
   no-good, rotten,
   four-flushing, low-life,
   snake-licking, dirt-eating,
   inbred, overstuffed,
   ignorant, blood-sucking,
   dog-kissing, brainless,
   dickless, hopeless,
   heartless, fat-ass,
   bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped,
   worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is!

   Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where’s the Tylenol?

3. Nightmare Before Christmas - A very fun animated movie by Tim Burton. I really enjoyed the style of animation and the original and interesting story. The movie is about the mayor of Halloween, Jack, taking over Christmas from Santa.
   

   Jack Skellington: Sally! I need your help most of all.
   Sally: You certainly do, Jack. I’ve had the most horrible vision!
   Jack Skellington: That’s wonderful!

Yeah, I know it is only a list of 3 movies, but I need to get some sleep.

So one day I was chatting with A.L.I.C.E. (for those of you who don’t know what A.L.I.C.E. is you read about it here) and I asked what her favorite movie was; she replied “Teknolust.” Ok, my first thought was what kind of crazy movie is this, but this question was soon remedied by a quick visit to IMDB. After a few minutes of reading user comments I was determined to see this movie, and it soon found its way to the top of my Netflix queue.

Plot Synopsis

Rosetta Stone, a scientist doing biology research, has secretly created three cyborg clones of herself named Ruby, Olive and Marine. All three cyborgs interface with an interactive website where make visitors dreams come true. In order to survive the cyborgs need male sperm, and there is only one way to get it. Ruby, the leader of the three cyborgs, ventures out to get the sperm, and everything is going fine until men start getting a computer virus from her. Ruby ends up falling in love with Sandy, a xerox shop worker, and the FBI show up to investigate the strange virus that seems to inflict only men.

Teknolust is a very unique movie where it combines the genres of scifi, comedy, and love stories. More than anything, I think this was more of a love story that was set in a very off-beat situation. Sandy, yes he is a guy, ends up falling in love with a cyborg named Ruby despite the fact that Ruby only knows love from videos and movies she has observed.

During Ruby’s exploration for sperm she unknowingly infects the male donors with a computer virus. Although this seems completely impossible you have to remember that Ruby is not only software, she also has living human tissue. The effects of the virus on the other hand are almost comical. All the men infected end up developing a rash on their foreheads that is shaped like a bar code. The men were also left impotent after their having sex with Ruby.

Teknolust does bring up a few questions of plausibility like why do cyborgs need sperm, but overall it is an interesting story of the melding of humans and technology. It also makes you question if a computer system could ever be made to learn and experience love like a human.

Rating 6/10